Good Bye 2008, Good Bye to those I knew.

Well it is the end of another year. A sorrow filled year. I know that part of life is death. I know that, but it doesn't make it any easier when it happens to the people that we love. 2008 started with deaths and ended with deaths of people that I have been close to.

It started early last year. January 4th my one of my oldest and dearest friends Karin lost her father. He battled and lost a hard fight with cancer and the last few months of his life he was in horrible pain. This truly was one of the kindest men I ever knew. He never and I do mean never raised his voice. Even raising 4 girls, some of whom (even Karin) would at times make any parent scream, he never did. Called everyone "kiddo". At his funeral they asked if anyone had any words they would like to say. I hate talking in public, but this man treated me like his own child, he always told me how beautiful I was and he made me feel that way. That is what I said when I stood up to tell of this wonderful man. Good bye Dale I Love You!

January 25th Shane lost his battle with addiction. A prelude to that was when we had gotten a call from his younger brothers Dec. 19 and said he couldn't wake him up. Jade and I got there and immediately told them to call 911. He wasn't breathing. It was so frightening I have taken about 12 CPR classes in my life never had I had to use it (and in all honesty I hope I never will have to again). It seemed like I forgot everything. Thank God for the 911 operator.
We knew Shane had a problem, but we didn't know how horrible it really was, his last month with us here was a roller coaster. I know he didn't want to be addicted, he was not a bad or evil kid. He was sweet, he did tell us things we wanted to hear at times, what kid doesn't. He didn't want to disappoint people. The day he left us he actually went to rehab. I don't know nor will I till I can see him again, but I truly think he wanted to get high just one more time. It bothers yet comforts me knowing he was holding a guardian angel when he died. That is my question, I don't think he meant to die, I think he got scared. I love you Shane so much!

April 7th I lost an old classmate of mine. Angie she lived just down the street from me and we met in kindergarten. We always either walked to and from school. Or get driven by her mom ever day till we graduated. After graduation we parted ways like alot of people do, but I seen her about 6 months before she passed. Diabetes made walking difficult. And that disease was too strong for her to overcome. She was only 40 years old. I missed her so much through the years, and now I will always miss her till I see her again.

The mother of one of my parents oldest and dearest friends past away this fall.

A grandchild of a friends died at 3 months of age. What can you say about a terrible thing like this?

My ex-sister in laws father died Dec. 10. Mr. Hurley's wife helped raise Jade as she was our day care provider for years.

Pets are often members of the family and my little Boston Terrier Peggy was no exception. She was killed by a car in July (she shared the same birthday as my niece Stephanie who died in March of 2007), and I so blame myself for her death. I am the one that opened the door. The only time she went into the road was chasing after animals, I did not look out that morning. She was a great little dog. I'm sorry Peggy.

Some of the many famous people that left us this year:
Paul Newman
Heath Ledger
Charlton Heston
George Carlin
Bernie Mac
Issac Hayes
Eartha Kitt (I seen her in the Wizard of Oz, at the Fox Theatre)
Michael Crichton
Estelle Getty
Larry Harmon
Tim Russert
Bo Diddley
Harvey Korman
Sydney Pollack
Dick Martin
Arthur C. Clarke
Roy Scheider
Suzanne Pleshette
Sir Edmund Hillary

Good Bye 2008, I hope 2009 brings more happiness then sorrow.

Can't wait for Epiphany?

Well as always Christmas always comes and goes quickly around here. I love my Christmas decorations and I hate taking them down every year. This year has to be a little different as we have finally broken down and have bought a new mattress!! I am so excited about this. For years I have been putting more and more padding between the springs that are poking through and the fitted sheets. When Mark wasn't living at home it wasn't too bad as I would sleep in the middle of the bed. But it is sad watching him wake up in the morning in as much pain if not more then he went to sleep with. It is a little weird going shopping for a mattress as the only way to really see if you like it is to try it out. With the sales man making his spiel as we go from one bed to another. We found one that offers both the support he needs and the comfyness (sp) I want. The prices are crazy, but as someone stated you spend a 1/3 of your life in bed and if he has a bad back, and it isn't something you shop for every year or two you really need to get one that is of good quality. The company offers free delivery and free hauling away of the old one.

But now that means I have to take down Christmas decorations or there will not be any room to get it in next Monday. Without crashing into everything. I will leave my little nativity up till the 6th, but all else must come down.

But taking it down is not as simple as putting it away. On Christmas eve I thought I would have time for a very short nap before all the fun and excitement. I was already curled up dozing when I heard Mark come in. He walks upstairs and said the kitchen ceiling is leaking!!! NO WAY! We just put nearly $10,000 in a new roof year before last! HOW CAN IT BE LEAKING!!! We have 4 attics in our house. Above the kitchen is the one I put decorations in so to see where the leak was we had to take out all the boxes. 1 nail, 1 crumby stinkin' nail was poking through in a corner where there was snow and ice build up. With the snow, rain and now wind Mark couldn't get up on the roof to fix it. Well Scott (our roofer) will be doing it, but knowing Mark he will help out. I just reminded him that maybe he can do it today. So every box of all the decorations for all the seasons are in the middle room upstairs. sigh.....

Happy New Year.

Christmas fun

Yesterday after the first service at church there was a family Sunday school, instead of the usual children's and adult classes that are separate. Complete with food (ahh us Lutherans like our food), music and crafts. Each family was able to make a Christmas tree to take home.

My littlest nephew Ryan, was having a wonderful time. Eating Aunt Nina's dounuts. And making his Christmas tree. I must say he did such a good job, he glued all the ornaments himself after I showed him how to get the glue going.

It is just over 2 weeks till Christmas day, and I have 1 decoration up. A nice table centerpiece my sister in law made for me. I just haven't had the time to put anything up, I am hoping today. I don't think I will get around to my iceicle lights that I usually put in all my window (how I love the look of them).

I have one 1 present bought, and not sure how we are going to pull off the rest. It seems like every year things get tighter and tighter and our daughter though she gets less presents they become more expensive. With classes starting up in January. However it seems that thing usually work out, and I am hoping for it to be this year also, I am going to try my hardest NOT to get stressed out about things, and hope my husband can do the same.

Yesterday watching the little guy made me remember what is important this time of year.

I Love You!

Three simple words that means so much. Do I not say it enough? Or is just taken for granted?

Yesterday I was sitting at home and thinking about my daughter. She was out shopping trying to get her mind off something that has been bothering her.

Anytime we talk on the phone or she leaves the house we always tell each other "I Love You". Well yesterday I picked up my cell and called her. Of course with caller id on her side she knew it was me.
"Hey Mom, what's up?"
I said "I Love You".
As soon as that was out she asked "What did I do?"
"Nothing, I just called to say I Love You, I Love You"
"I Love You too Mom, really that's it?"
"Yep, see ya and be careful" and I hung up.

When she got home a few hours later she came in and asked "You really just called me to tell me I Love You?" I walked over to her and gave her a huge hug and said "Yep, that is all I called for, just to tell you I Love You".

Later in the evening we turned the tv off and we just talked, sometimes she and I don't see eye to eye, but yesterday was alittle special and I think it was just from a simple phone call and three little words that mean so very much.

I LOVE YOU!

Wow things were messed up.

The other day I was messing around online and low and behold I found something that sank my heart. It was a blog I had started when my marriage was going down like a fast roller coaster. It was started in 2004, and lasted during the first part of our multi-year separation I had with my husband. I know that divorce can be the cowards way out sometimes, but looking at some of those awful moments that my husband and I were going through, wow.

Life was just terrible for a very long time before he moved out. And truth be told the only reason that we didn't get the divorce finalized was he wouldn't have had health insurance any longer. Sometimes I didn't want to care about him needing it, but he has a bone disease and I could never stop loving him.

It is odd to think that a separation would help a relationship, but it did. It scared him. Since he moved back home, last year I can't say things are perfect. I really don't think anyone has a perfect relationship. But when he thought he was going to lose me forever, he changed and things are so much better.

I pray that we keep the strength alive to still love and respect each other.

I shuttered as I read those old posts in my blog, it made me cold inside.

What a fun and exciting time

This coming Friday I will be making my way to Mt. Pleasant for the yearly Michigan Wildlife Rehabilitation Assoc. meeting that will be held Friday evening and all day Saturday. I love seeing the people who I only get to actually "see" once a year. Although this year is a little disappointing that I am missing the opening day of firearm season, which falls on the 15th (Sat.). I am not the only one that is in wildlife rehab that hunts, there are not many of us though. Some people are completely against hunting in the rehab groups I belong to, however a huge majority know that most hunters are the biggest conservationists. For me my wildlife rehab is my way of giving back.I have been in a hunting family my whole life. My dad never left us at home when he would go up to the cabin. No matter what kind of hunting the whole family went with him. Even my uncles would come along.This will be the last year that MWRA will be hosting their meeting during the hunting season. Many are not able to come due to them or their spouses going hunting, but I don't' want to miss it. Not only to see the other members, but it is great educational experience. I love learning more and more every year.Also I get to have my yearly mini-vacation. I will be staying till Sunday. Saturday after my meeting I am planning on trying out my gambling skills. I have never been to a casino, but I have always wanted to try the slots. I know that what I come in with will not be going home with me. So I am leaving with a SMALL amount of money and that is it. I just want to go have fun.When I get back I will be heading out to my hunting spot around the corner from my house and will be spending the next 3 days out there too. I just love being in "my spot" even if I never see a deer all season. I will see so much other wildlife come through. One year a coopers hawk sat on a branch just outside of my shanty window. What a gorgeous bird God has made. I never knew they had blue in them, but with him sitting less then 3ft from my head, I could marveledat the wonderful creature.This is my sisters first year hunting and I wish her luck. So on the family farm (168acres) both my parents, my sister, her husband, my brother, his oldest son, and my husband will all be out. My parents have a log cabin in the back of the property that we will use to warm up and eat at. It is always a fun time together and reminds me of the days when we would go 'up north' to go hunting.I can not wait!

What a wonderful Halloween

I am so happy about this last Halloween. Though my dad was in pain, and as he stated "only fell 3 times this week", and was black and blue in many places, he dressed up for Halloween.

What a wonderful time we had.

Unfortunately my mom was in pain with her stomach again, well more then her stomach, the ultra-sound shows, I told her to go up stairs and rest for awhile. Dad and I would be fine. I think she was glad to hear it and didn't argue with me.

Dad had me dress up a dummy monster stuffed with newspaper on the side of their porch, as I tried to hurry him along, because trick or treating was starting and he had to eat and to take his insulin first (I thought for sure by time he finished the costumed kids would be done).

He came out right after I had finished handing the first group of kids their goodies. He put on his monster mask and I stuffed newspaper where I could see skin, much like the stuffed monster on the other side of the porch. And he sat next to me. I was in the middle of two monsters.

As the little kids came by I would ask them to say "hi to my monster" they would timidly look at him motionless and say their hellos, as they walked away he would say "hi" back to them. Only one little one started crying and we explained that it was only my dad playing like the rest of the kids. Most of the kids really got a kick out of my dad, as did I.

There was a little girl clown that came up and spent about 5-10 minutes with us, we are sure she was not even 5 years old yet. She had so many questions for "the monster" and I think that if it was up to her she would have stayed the whole time with us. She was so adorable and though she never got too close to dad she wasn't scared either. That little girl made my dads day.

My dad made my day.

My brother in law Eric came back sooner then my sister and their little guy Ryan (who just turned 4 a couple of weeks ago) and put on a old lady mask and wig on. So I had 'my grandma' and 'my monster' with me.

When Ryan got back to the house he wasn't really scared, but he wasn't sure what to think of the 2 of them either.

What a wonderful time we had. My daughter and her new guy that she has been hangin' with came over for awhile. What wonderful memories I hope to never lose.